Dawn of the Dead

Oh, goodie. Another movie about zombies. Do you humans even try to come up with original ideas anymore? It's different for me; when I come from, ninety nine point nine six zero six zero percent of all viable ideas have been made, remade, have at least two sequels, a direct to video sequel, translations into six thousand languages including movish, which was a language created solely for translating movies into. Life grew very dull for a stretch there in the late trillions, until the Nyalad re-discovered fire. Yeah, you're distant ancestors lost fire. I know. Pathetic. I'm used to this level of disdain though.

This zombie movie is, much like ever zombie movie ever made, much like every zombie movie ever made. In all due seriousness, it does not bear to give a description. The special effects are effective, if not all that special. Limiting the experience to two of your already sensationally reduced sensed is foolish, and makes the whole experience painfully dull to someone of my incredible intelligence. It's somewhat akin to watching Shakespeare performed in one dimension, if you can even imagine that, which you can't, so I really shouldn't bother. Suffice to say, you'll enjoy it, because you are stupid. Well, you are. It's true. Really. I have an IQ greater than your population, I can say these things.

You know what? I don't need to recount the plot. It's a zombie movie. It's exactly like the rest. I'll be skipping to the numerical analysis now, as it's not worth devoting the three computational cycles it would take me to finish this paragraph.

I shall deign to give this, and every other movie of this genre, basically, a 3.928645 out of 5. Good clean fun if you like seeing people ripped to shreds. Which you do, you barbarians.